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Going to Valhalla

I grew up a Christian but have been nonreligious for many years. Some would view this as a regression in my character. I cannot point to a date on a calendar, a particular conversation or a book I read but I have been lacking the certainty of faith so many seem to have.

Maybe it was Science class in Grade Six.
Burned into my mind the scientific method.

Outlining a Purpose.
Defining a Procedure.
Documenting the Results.
Coming to a Conclusion.

I read an article about the conflict between Darwinism and Creation, written by Fred Reed. Talked of the origins of life. The purpose isn’t hard to understand. Most want to know why. It is the Procedure where the flaws are exposed. The results and conclusions are then inevitably doomed. The opposing camps left to stare at each other with their contempt the only thing they share.

There are many immutable Laws in Science that I can lean on. However even I must admit that when it comes to very beginning even scientists get stuck.

Then there is for me the paradox underlying everything. I can’t help but think that some force is showing the way. The scientific method may rule but it has been trumped on several occasions by the interesting cards fate and synchronicity have dealt my life.

So it does bother me that there are folks who claim with 100% certainty that Jesus will return to earth someday. That on that day all the mysteries will have an answer. I guess the only thing left to do in response to a statement like that is to go to fridge and get a beer.

What is a fella to do. After some careful thought I have decided to go to Valhalla instead.

Why? Well that’s easy.
There is liquor and whores for everyone there.

I did make my first prayer to Odin and he got back to me real quick! Hardly a surprise when one thinks about it. He is, it is rumoured, not getting much business these days. He is in essence the MySpace of Deities.

I ended up getting a response sent UPS express.
Way better then Olden days.
He made God look like Canada Post.

He did tell me not to worry about Jesus. He is there too! He admitted that at first he was a bit of an uptight cunt. But after 2000 or so years he is partying like it was 1999.

My goal now is that I will be there someday. Sitting between Marilyn Monroe and Greta Garbo. The only problem now is that I have to die in battle.

But wishes could be granted. With this fourth turning in full swing that problem may, in the end, solve itself.

Odin did also tell me that the beer is great.
A brew fitting for a great hall.
A comfort for me and something to look forward too!

How can one not agree.

 

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